Ruins of the Past
by My Lady Vader
Summary: Updated and heavily edited version of 'Learning to Live.' From the ashes of a once great republic, former padawan learner Ahsoka Tano must make sense of her new life and the demands that come with it. She soon is faced with a decision where she could become involved with the rising insurrection against the Empire, or to stay in the shadows and live the quiet life she once craved.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hullo my dear readers. This is the updated version of one of my first stories, so hopefully this will be smoother than the last one. I've made a few little changed, but I've mostly tried to stick with the basic storyline that I had before, but I'm also aware of the changes that have been made in canon, as well as the fact that there have been episodes of the Clone Wars that have occurred which conflict with this story, as well as Ahsoka's return in Rebels. So I'm going to try to keep all of those things in mind, but honestly, we know that this story will be vastly different than the direction that Rebels goes.**

 **Anyway, please let me know what you think of this update, and look for the next chapter tomorrow!**

 **MLV**

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The cantina wasn't busy, but it never was. All the usual patrons were there. The Duros with the eyepatch was sucking down his L'lahsh as quickly as he could-Ahsoka knew that he had three children and a very loud wife at home, and he had a total of 15 minutes between the end of his work shift and when his children needed to be picked up from their lessons. He was sitting next to the Quarren who didn't drink, and no one really knew why he stuck around, but it had been this way for so long that Ahsoka didn't find it strange anymore.

Her comm beeped, and she excused herself to find a quiet place so she could answer. To her surprise, it was Obi-Wan.

" _Ahsoka, it's good to see you. I'm glad you picked up."_

Ahsoka felt a guilty pang. She had ignored the Jedi Master's calls for the first six months after she left the Jedi Order, and eventually he had stopped contacting her. Anakin had never contacted her, and she felt the guilt towards that more keenly. Her former master was better at holding grudges than Obi-Wan was, though.

"Yes, Obi-Wan, can I help you?" she asked, trying to keep her voice low. She didn't know how her fellow cantina goers would react to hearing about her status as a former Jedi.

" _I'm afraid that we've got a bit of a situation on our hands. The Chancellor has been kidnapped, and Anakin and I are about to leave on a rescue mission."_

Ahsoka frowned. "Obi-Wan, I'm sorry to hear that, but I'm not sure what that has to do with me," she said slowly.

" _There have been a few attacks here on the ground. I wanted to ask you to act as security for the Senatorial complex."_

Ahsoka's frown deepened. "Obi-Wan, I don't want to go back."

" _Please, Ahsoka. We're thin on help right now. No one will know it's you, nor that you're back. It will only be until we get back."_ Ahsoka could see the pleading look on the miniature version of Obi-Wan's face, and she caved.

"Fine, Obi-Wan. I'll help."

She had left for Coruscant city a few hours later, careful to keep enough time from the comcall to her arrival. She didn't want Obi-Wan to know she had been on the planet when he commed. He greeted her warmly when she arrived, and they rushed off to the complex where she would lay low and wait for an attack. He left soon after, and Ahsoka sat herself down to wait.

It was only a few hours later when she found herself covered in dust and fighting off attacks from men who were once her brothers in arms. Everything had rushed by in the blink of an eye, and she hadn't been able to talk him down. Ahsoka sat in the dirt and made designs with her finger while she replayed that last moment over and over in her mind.

She had entered the temple alone. Her new lightsabers were clutched in her hands, and she forced herself to keep quite. The white light that beamed from the hilt lit of her lightsaber guided her way through the darkened halls. Every so often, she needed to step over the bodies of dead Jedi, and she refused to look at them for fear of seeing a friend from long ago. The halls were silent, and she tried to ignore the echoes that rang in her ears of the dying Jedi; she believed that these halls would continue to echo those sounds until the end of time itself.

Before she realized where she was going, Ahsoka found herself in front of the doors of the Council Room. Memories flooded her mind of all the times she had stood before the circle of Masters, and she pushed them away again. She had one last mission to complete. She pressed her ear against the door and closed her eyes. Placing all of her concentration into the room, Ahsoka listened. Through the force, she was able to get a glimpse of what was happening.

"Master Skywalker, there are too many of them! What are we going to do?" She knew that voice. The youngling's name was Liam, she thought. The younglings must have locked themselves in the council room to hide from the clones. Tension she hadn't known she'd been carrying broke, and her shoulders drooped. Anakin was there, he would protect them. She might not even have to see him. That thought both saddened and relived her.

There was no reply except that of the _snap hiss_ of an igniting lightsaber. Ahsoka didn't think when she used the force to open the doors. Her thoughts escaped her when she rushed past her former mentor and they certainly weren't present when her own lightsabers clashed with his.

It was evident that he hadn't known she'd been on the planet, let alone right outside the door. She refused to give him any leeway when he pushed back against her. The man in front of her was not her master, nothing more than a shell of her former best friend.

"What are you doing, Anakin?" His lightsaber slacked, and he let it rest, the tip barely missing the ground.

"Why are you here?" he asked her.

She gestured her lightsaber towards the frightened younglings, who had by now moved behind her. Suddenly the weight of what was about to happen hit her shoulders, and her own lightsabers dropped too, mirroring his. "Obviously about to stop you from making the biggest mistake of your life."

His hand pinched the bridge of his nose, and Ahsoka used the break in his focus to gesture to the younglings to slip out the door. They carefully snuck behind them, and Ahsoka spoke, hoping to distract him.

"Anakin, what has become of you?"

"She's dying, Ahsoka," Anakin's voice broke. His hand dropped from his face, but his eyes remained closed. "I can't lose her."

Of course, she had known. It was hard for the senator and Jedi to keep their romance a secret from her, especially when they acted like parents when she was around. But she hadn't heard anything about Padmé dying.

"Anakin, what do you mean she's dying?" She whispered the words, afraid of breaking some kind of trance. His eyes opened and a soft yellow was taking over the once blue eyes. He whirled around and caught the last of the younglings with his lightsaber.

"No!" The word broke from her lungs and scraped against her throat before breaking the silence that followed the blow of the lightsaber. Ahsoka dropped her weapons and used the force to pull Anakin away from the younglings and towards the other side of the room. He landed awkwardly on the floor and Ahsoka gripped one of the chamber's seats and threw it on top of him. She blew past the door and checked the vitals of the last youngling. They were low, but they were there. She scooped him up, and commanded her lightsabers to her hands before buckling them to her belt. She jumped to her feet and flew after the other younglings. They weren't far up ahead, and together, they left the temple.

"Tano!" The voice didn't belong to Anakin, and she stopped and turned. Shaak Tii was running to catch up. "I went to get the younglings, and saw what had happened."

"Help me," Ahsoka said, and transferred the injured youngling into Shaak Tii's arms.

"There's bacta in my bag," Shaak said. "It might help."

Ahsoka knew that it wouldn't, but they could at least try. She put the supplies away and they continued on. Sticking to the shadows, they made it to an empty house where they decided to rest. Shaak took the injured youngling upstairs, and Ahsoka tried to quiet the rest.

A small youngling crawled into her lap and whispered in her ear. "Tell me a story." And Ahsoka told them a fairy tale from Shilii. The exhaustion soon overtook them, and the younglings all fell asleep. Ahsoka stayed quiet, relishing in the silence. Shaak came down the stairs slowly, and Ahsoka gently removed the youngling-Damari-from her lap and walked over to the older Togruta.

She placed her hands over her eyes and sighed. "He didn't make it," she whispered, and Ahsoka watched her drop to the floor. There was an awkward silence between them, and Ahsoka didn't know what to say. It had been a long time since she'd seen the other woman, and didn't know how to comfort her. In the end, she decided to leave her alone, and Ahsoka went outside. Dust from the battle at the temple settled, and Ahsoka sat down hard and watched the disturbed dust fall, which was when she found herself drawing in the dirt, symbols that once meant something to her, but now were nothing better than doodles.

Shaak joined her, and Ahsoka looked up at her, not sure what to say.

"We need to keep moving," she said, sitting down next to Ahsoka. "I know the younglings are exhausted, and traumatized, but they will all die if we stay here. We have to steal a transport." Ahsoka could tell that she was rambling, and she wondered if the Jedi Master had ever stolen anything in her life.

"If you watch the younglings," Ahsoka began, careful to word the next few words so that it didn't come across as superior, "I can get the transport. Since my time away from the Jedi, I've acquired some skills that might come in handy."

Shaak gave Ahsoka a sharp look, and Ahsoka winced, but Shaak's face softened and she placed a hand on Ahsoka's arm. "Thank you," she whispered. Ahsoka smiled at her and nodded before getting up and heading out in search of a transport big enough for all of them.

With each step, Ahsoka thought about the fact that Anakin had more or less let her go with the younglings. Yes, he had killed that poor boy, but they both knew that he was powerful enough to have overcome and kill her, and then take care of the younglings. Whatever had happened to him, Ahsoka knew that there was a part of him that abhorred the actions that he was committing. And that gave her hope.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who followed/Favorited this story! This makes me happy. :) This chapter is shorter than I wanted, but I had mountains of homework that pushed aside so I could write this. Anyway, hope you enjoy and look for chapter 3 tomorrow!**

 **MLV**

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Ahsoka peered into the spaceport. There were more clones here than what she would have preferred, but things might be alright. Because she wasn't in the Jedi Records anymore listed as an active Jedi, she might be able to get away with just convincing them to give her a ship. Just before she got up the nerve to go over to them, she felt the end of a blaster against her back.

"Halt, Jedi."

Ahsoka froze, and then slowly raised her hands. She didn't move until she felt the blaster pressure leave. "I'm not a jedi," she began, overly conscious of the lightsabers attached her to her belt. "I left the Jedi order a while ago."

The clone's all paused and looked at each other. One of them stepped forward. "Tell me your name," he demanded.

"Ahsoka Tano. You will see in your records that I left the Jedi when they refused to believe me when I was framed for a terror attack on the Jedi Temple." Ahsoka tried not to ramble and kept her voice calm. If the troopers didn't think she was going to attack them, they might let her go easier. Maybe even let her have transport.

One of the clones, the one who had demanded her name, stepped forward again. "Your story checks out. Why are you back here?"

Ahsoka took in a breath. "I couldn't believe the stories. I had to see for myself," she answered.

The clone paused, and then put away his computer. He hesitated, and then put his hand on her shoulder. Ahsoka looked up at him sharply. "I know what it's like to be betrayed by the people you care about," he began. Some of the clones around him shifted nervously, but he continued. "It's especially hard when it comes out of nowhere. But we get through it by relying on our family."

Ahsoka smiled at him. "Thank you," she said softly, and he nodded. She was afraid to push her luck, but eventually decided to ask him about the transport. He agreed to let her access to one of the former Jedi.

"I don't think they'll be needing it any time soon," he said with a chuckle, but Ahsoka sensed that there was no real humor in his voice.

Ahsoka thanked him and quickly left and headed towards a medium sized ship. It would be a tight fit, but she was sure it would fit all of the younglings, Shaak, and herself. She entered the ship and punched in the new codes that would let her leave Coruscant without being blasted into deep space. The ship was easy enough to fly, and she left the spaceport.

She flipped the comm on and searched the channels. Nothing seemed to stand out. She couldn't set the ship down next to the house; that would cause too much commotion. Ahsoka sighed and flipped the comm on again. She supposed it made sense that Shaak wouldn't have a comm unit, but it certainly made things complicated. She sighed, and decided to put the ship down in the undercity. It would be dangerous for the younglings, but safer than going through territory filled with Clones.

The undercity spaceport was filled with pirates and gang members, and she couldn't just leave the ship. She set it down on a relatively abandoned pad. There was no security, which meant she didn't need to go through any official channels, but it also meant that there wasn't any security. Once the ship was down, she left the ship, making sure to remove a vital component from the landing gear, which locked the ship into place. She tucked it into her belt and walked away. The ship would be able to fly, but it would take anyone a few hours of work to rewire it to essentially ignore the fact that the component was missing.

It took her about thirty minutes to make it back to the house. The younglings were still all sleeping, and Shaak was staring blanking at a wall. Ahsoka walked into the main room, and Shaak jumped slightly.

"I didn't see you," she said.

"I've got a ship. It's in the undercity. We have to be careful," Ahsoka said.

"How did you get it past the clones?" Shaak asked. Her voice was low, and Ahsoka looked to the younglings.

"It doesn't matter," she whispered. She couldn't admit that she had gotten it because the clone had understood how she felt by being betrayed by the Jedi, that she had played that up. "We have to be incredibly careful. The undercity is very dangerous, especially since we have the younglings."

"They need sleep," Shaak said slowly.

"We don't have time," Ahsoka told her.

Shaak nodded. "I know. I just wish…" She stood up. "Let's go." They both went over and woke the younglings. Damari ran to Ahsoka and demanded to be held. Ahsoka picked her up, and took the hand of one of the other younger children.

"Ahsoka has gotten us a ship," Shaak said. "But it's very far away, and through a very dangerous part of the city. So stay close to us, and well get you out of here."

Liam stepped up, and even though his chin was quivering, spoke with a strong voice. "Master Tii, where are we going?"

Ahsoka and Shaak exchanged looks, and then Shaak turned back to Liam. "Let's get to the ship before we worry about anything."

Ahsoka tightened her grip on the youngling's hand, and they headed away to the undercity. Ahsoka looked at Damari, who had fallen asleep in her arms. The rest of the younglings crowded around them, and Ahsoka nodded in the direction they were supposed to go, and they headed out.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I am so sorry about how late this is. I've had essays due, and then a cold/flu from hell. Anyway, this is shorter than I wanted, but I also didn't want you guys to keep waiting. Again, sorry about the wait, and hopefully updates will be more regular now.**

 **MLV**

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The undercity wasn't as clean as the upper part, and while Ahsoka was relatively used to it by now, the younglings clung to her and Shaak's hands. Damari, who was still hanging from Ahsoka's frame, shivered and whimpered, and Ahsoka did her best to send reassurances through the force to the young would be Jedi, but she didn't stop shaking. A few of the younglings started to lag behind.

"Hurry, younglings," she hissed, pausing to get their attention. The younglings grumbled and picked up the pace, but just a little bit. Ahsoka knew they were scared, and they had every right to be.

"Master Tii," Ahsoka whispered, acutely aware of how quickly her old habits were returning. "Hold up a moment."

Shaak paused, and Ahsoka walked over to her. "I think the younglings could use a little bit of motivation. On the battlefield, I know that when Master Kenobi would give speeches, it really helped to motivate the clones." It was still too easy to talk about them as her brothers, and Ahsoka felt the tips of her fingers get cold when an angry look crossed Shaak's face, but Ahsoka didn't offer any apology, nor did she take back what she said.

"If you want to say something, I won't stop you," Shaak replied. Ahsoka nodded at her and turned to look at the younglings. They were all shifting from one foot to the other, and tired faces adorned each of them.

"Younglings," she began. They all perked up slightly. "I know this is difficult. Many terrifying things happened today, and you all are very scared, and you have every right to be." She shifted Damari from one hip to the other.

"But if we're to make it off this planet alive and well, we need to be more than younglings today. We need to be Jedi, strong in the face of danger. The ship is a little more than twenty minutes away, but that's only if we can walk quickly."

"Why can't we get a speeder?" one of the boys asked.

"It's too risky," Ahsoka explained but didn't go into more detail. "I know you're all tired, but you will be able to sleep once we're on the ship. I promise."

The younglings nodded tired heads, and the group began walking again.

Damari fell asleep halfway there, and Ahsoka struggled to keep her in her arms. The girl was little more than dead weight, but Ahsoka was loath to wake her. Damari was one of the smallest of the younglings, and she was completely exhausted. Ahsoka spared a glance at the other younglings. They all were exhausted. There wasn't any room where they were at now to land a ship, otherwise Ahsoka would suggest retrieving it and then coming back for them.

They were in the heart of the pirate's territory. Ahsoka couldn't remember their names. Red something? Maybe it was red. It didn't matter. Maybe Ahsoka should attempt to get a speeder big enough for all of them. She sped up until she was next to Shaak.

"We've entered pirate territory," Ahsoka told her. "I think it might be best if I get a speeder to take us the rest of the way. Two women and a group of children will easily be picked off."

"Even if one of them is a Jedi?" Shaak asked, and Ahsoka ignored the barb.

"Yes. Trust me, I've dealt with pirates before. Jedi don't scare them. Plus, they've got numbers on their side."

Shaak frowned and looked around. "I don't sense any trouble."

"But if trouble comes, there's too many of them to fully protect the younglings against," Ahsoka said, and without waiting for an answer, let Damari fall into Shaak's arms. Ahsoka stretched out her own arms and started to walk away from them. "I'll be right back," she promised.

Finding a speeder wasn't a problem. There were hundreds of them all over the undercity. The problem was that they were all owned by spice pirates who shot first and asked questions…well, never. Still, if she could find one that was isolated enough from the rest of the group, she supposed she could take it from them. Except that's where the problem got bigger: none of the speeders has less than seven pirates surrounding it. Ahsoka continued walking, looking for the one with the least amount of firepower around it.

She finally found one that looked big enough to hold most of the padawans, if not all, and it was only being watched by one pirate. The problem with this was he was huge, and his weapon was equally big. Ahsoka took in a breath. There was little likelihood that she could force persuade him to let her have it, but she thought if she could draw him into an alleyway, she could, at least, fight him without the rest of his gang attacking her too.

Ahsoka staked out a few alleys before finding one that ended in a dead end. It wasn't too far from the big guy, and it didn't cross the paths of the rest of the pirates that were milling around the area. Ahsoka contemplated a moment about how she was going to distract the pirate and get him to the alleyway.

As she was deciding what to do, a scantily clad woman made her way up to the pirate. She seemed to be purring and reached up to touch the pirate's face. At first, Ahsoka thought it might be his girlfriend or a lover, but he grabbed her arm and tossed her to the ground. Words were exchanged between the two, and the woman turned and left. Ahsoka watched as she moved towards another pirate, lower in rank. She did the same thing as before, but this time, something was exchanged and the two left. Whoops and hollers followed them from the other pirates, and Ahsoka felt something growing in her stomach. _Well_ , she thought to herself. _There is that._

Ahsoka removed her leggings, shin guards and the guards on her arms before pulling her suit down low. Her skin was crawling with the very thought of attempting this, but she shook it off. Walking over to the pirate, Ahsoka giggled and waved slyly at him. He looked at her appreciatively, and took a step towards her.

"What's your price?" He asked, getting straight to the point.

Ahsoka swiped her hand in front of his face. "A small price to pay for a good time," she said, using the force to alter his mind.

"A small price to pay for a good time," the pirate repeated slowly. He blinked a few times, and Ahsoka was afraid that he was going to wake up, but when she took a few steps away from him, he followed her. She took his hand and led him to the alley. There were a few confused looks from the other pirates, and Ahsoka wondered if he wasn't supposed to leave his post.

Once they were in the alley, the pirate threw her against the wall and began kissing her neck. Ahsoka struggled against his weight, and stretched her arm out behind her to retrieve her lightsaber. It flew to her hand, and the pirate stopped his assault.

"What was that?" he asked.

"Something to add to the fun," Ahsoka whispered in his ear, and then slammed her lightsaber into his head. He backed away, crying out, but he didn't fall. Ahsoka force pushed him against the other wall and jumped towards him. He grabbed her foot and twisted her, and she fell with a thud. It took her a second to regain her breath, and she kicked his face with her free foot. The pirate growled and stood up in a hurry and she fell off his lap in a pile. She sensed that he was going to kick her, and she used his momentum against him. Using the force to push herself up, Ahsoka swept his leg and he fell down hard.

The pirate's head slammed on the ground, and Ahsoka held her lightsaber up, ready to ignite it, but the pirate didn't wake. She paused before leaning down and feeling for his pulse; he was alive, but unconscious. She let out a breath before grabbing her discarded clothing and heading back to the speeder. A few of the pirates looked her way, but Ahsoka used the force to make her presence minimal.

Tossing her stuff into the speeder, Ahsoka jumped in. The keys weren't in the ignition, which meant they were still on the pirate. Ahsoka looked over her shoulder and saw that the large pirate was starting to stir. Ahsoka let out a frustrated noise and hopped out of the speeder before sprinting back to the pirate. He was just starting to come to his senses when Ahsoka reached him. She rifled through his pockets a moment before finding the keys.

"The Republic thanks you for your donation," Ahsoka told him before smacking the end of her lightsaber into his face. He fell limp once more.

Ahsoka stood up and brushed herself off and headed back towards the speeder, keys jingling in her hands. The other pirates still watched her, but they seemed to be confused as to what they should do. Ahsoka blew them a kiss before jumping back into the speeder. With the keys in the ignition, Ahsoka sped back towards Shaak and the younglings.


	4. Chapter 4

**Guys, this was written in haste, and you can really tell. I'm so sorry it's been so long since I've updated. After the 'Rebels' season finale, I had to figure out how I was going to incorporate that into this Universe I'm creating, and whether or not I would be able to do that at all. I've finally decided that this story will follow canon that the Clone Wars produced, and not much else. It will probably follow the legends canon more so than the canon that exists now (seeing as that is Rebels and now Rogue One), so let's see how it goes.**

 **Anyway, this is hurried because I wanted to get it out to you asap. Also, due to school, I won't be able to update once a day. Expect updates bi-weekly (Tuesdays and Saturdays) until June 25th, when I'm out of school and back from my trip to Europe. I hope this is play with everyone!**

 **Also, please ignore all mistakes I've made in here. I haven't looked it over, and honestly, I probably won't.**

 **MLV**

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Ahsoka made it back to the younglings in no time. They were all excited at the prospect of leaving the undercity, up until they found out not all of them would be able to make it in the first round.

"What do you mean they can't all fit?" Shaak asked.

Ahsoka sighed. "This speeder can only handle so much weight, and the combined weight of you, myself and all of the padawans exceeds that limit. So some of them will have to stay here and wait for me to return."

Shaak put her hand over her eyes and gently rubbed her brow. "And I suppose I need to stay with the ship," she said, defeated.

Ahsoka nodded. "It won't take long," she promised.

They both divided the group of children, and while Shaak was loading the first group, Ahsoka took the rest to an abandoned building. She squatted in front of them and tried to calm their nerves. "Stay here and stay quiet. Nothing can hurt you if you stay hidden," she promised. "Please, just be still. I will return soon." The younglings all quivered in fear, and Ahsoka felt a pang of guilt at leaving them, but she had no other choice.

The ride over was quick and uneventful. Ahsoka pushed the speeder to its fullest capacity, and once the younglings were unloaded, headed back to the building that she had left the younglings in. A sinking feeling formed in her gut, and she pressed the accelerator past the limit. The speeder slammed to a stop right before she reached the building, and her blood ran cold at what she saw.

Stormtroopers with fire cannons aimed their weapons on the building and it went up in a blaze. Screams from the younglings erupted over the noise of the fire, and Ahsoka felt their pain as if she were experiencing it herself. There was no way to get past the guards. Ahsoka ignited her lightsabers a moment, trying to decide how she could get past them, but a soft voice inside of her whispered that there was nothing she could do. The screaming got louder, and Ahsoka clenched her hands across the metal of her sabers and rage filled her core.

This is what the Empire was. Murderers of children.

Something caught her eye, and she looked to see a sandy haired main motioning to the building. She shook her head, not sure what he was getting at. He pointed to the troopers, to her, and then in a different direction, at him, and then back at the building. He wanted to get the children out. Ahsoka nodded, stood up in the speeder, and shouted at the troopers.

"Hey! Instead of attacking defenseless children, why don't you take your chances with a Jedi!" She swung her lightsabers in the air before jumping back into the speeder. The speeder lurched forward, and Ashoka rushed past them. A few of the troopers stayed behind, but all of them stopped burning the building. Ahsoka reached for a spare blaster, knowing that there was no way a pirate would have a speeder without one. Riding in a large circle until she found it, Ahsoka drew the troopers away, shooting at them periodically.

Once they were out of sight of the building, Ahsoka stopped the speeder and aimed at the troopers chasing after her. Two shots hit their targets, and then the troopers were upon her. She used her lightsabers to remove the rest of the threats. She scrambled back to the speeder and flew to the building.

About half of the younglings were out, covered in soot and coughing up a storm, but they were safe. She loaded them into the speeder and ran to the building, only to meet the mystery man and another youngling.

"How many are left?" she asked, taking the boy from him.

"The rest are dead," he said. "These ones were close. They need medical attention."

"We need to get to my ship," Ahsoka replied. "Come with us."

He shook his head, shot her a grin, and said, "I think I'll take my chances. Good luck, Jedi."

Ahsoka didn't correct him, merely took the boy to the speeder. She shot one last glance at the burning building, and part of the code she hadn't thought of in a long time entered her mind: _do not mourn those who transfer into the force._

Ahsoka squeezed her eyes shut, said a quick Shili prayer for the dead, and took off with the rest of the children.

Shaak was waiting for them when they arrived at the ship.

"There were troopers," Ahsoka explained. "Only some of them made it."

Shaak looked horrified, but she helped Ahsoka transfer them to the ship. Once they were all on board, Ahsoka ran to the controls and after putting the missing component back in place, took off. They were finally headed out of Coruscant, and towards safety.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Enjoy chapter 5 and look for a much longer chapter 6 on Saturday!**

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Ahsoka relished in the quiet. It had been a long few days, and she hadn't had a moment of peace since before she returned to the upper city of Coruscant. No, it had been more than a few days. A week, at least.

The ship was sailing smoothly, and they were on their way to Shili. Shaak mentioned knowing someone who could help smuggle the children to families on different planets. Ahsoka briefly wondered where Shaak had met this person who knew so much about smuggling, but never asked.

There was a knock on the door, and Ahsoka told them to come in. One of the younglings, Damari, entered.

"Ahsoka?" she asked. Ahsoka noted the worry surrounding the girl.

"Can I help you with something?"

Damari didn't answer right away, and Ahsoka kept quiet, waiting for her. "Where is Lusca and the others?"

A pang of guilt shot through her, and Ahsoka pinched her eyes closed. "Damari, I couldn't save them." There was a sniffle, and Ahsoka opened her eyes to see Damari silently crying.

"I know I shouldn't be sad," she said slowly, but her voice broke and the tears began running. "But I miss them so much." She began sobbing, and it hiccupped her words.

Ahsoka stood and walked to the girl before enveloping her with her arms. "Shh," she cooed. "I know you do. I am so sorry."

"I know Master Yoda tells us not to cry, or to miss those who died," she began, but her crying became too intense for her to continue. Her body relaxed its rigid stance and she fell into Ahsoka's embrace.

"No, that's not what he means." Ahsoka searched for the right words, but was coming up short. She knew that was exactly what Yoda had said, but that was not what this girl needed to hear at the moment.

"What that means is they've become one with the force. That must be something special. We shouldn't miss them because they're not really gone: if they are one with the force, and the force is what binds the universe together, doesn't that mean they are always with us? Whenever we call on the force as our ally, or meditate, we are with them, and they with us."

Damari pulled away and looked at her thoughtfully. "So they don't really leave?"

Ahsoka reached up and gently rubbed the tears from the girl's face. "Of course not. They are always with us, we just can't see or hear them anymore."

Damari hiccupped once, and then nodded slowly. "I think I like that," she whispered.

Ahsoka smiled at her and took her hand and squeezed. "I think I do too."

"I think I'm going to go back to the other younglings." She turned and went to the door, but stopped before opening it. "Ahsoka? Why aren't you a Jedi anymore?"

Ahsoka's smiled slipped. "I don't really know, Damari."

She nodded and left the room, leaving Ahsoka alone with those thoughts.

 _The sandy haired man returned, but they weren't on Coruscant anymore. Ahsoka didn't know where she was. She felt groggy, faces blurred together and broke apart with missing pieces, or extra eyes and ears and a missing nose. Ahsoka blinked hard, hoping to clear her vision. The world turned grey and then the colors weren't right._

 _"_ _What's happening?"_

 _The sandy haired man put his hands on her shoulders to steady her, but all that did was cause him to begin to spin like a wheel. "Help to you from me I gave."_

 _"_ _I don't understand you," Ahsoka told him, and he just patted her shoulder._

 _Yoda appeared, sitting on his shoulder. "Listen, padawans, you should. Space Opera is not accurate."_

 _Obi-Wan was behind them dancing with the Senator from Ryloth...but it wasn't him?_

 _"_ _What is going on?" Ahsoka yelled, and tried to pull free._

 _Snips._

 _The world stopped, and suddenly all the faces disappeared. Standing in front of her was Anakin, but it wasn't him. There was something wrong, but she couldn't quite place it. There was a shadow over him, and Ahsoka couldn't see through it._

 _"_ _Anakin, what happened? Why am I here?"_

 _Anakin extended his hand to her, and Ahsoka reached out to take it, but the ground beneath them began to split, and there was a chasm between them. Ahsoka looked in, and it was full of a thick blackness. There was a shape- maybe a face?-but she couldn't make it out._

 _The blackness filled her eyes and suddenly she was falling._

She was aware of jerking when she fell, and then realized she was awake, Sweat beaded Ahsoka's forehead and she rubbed her palms against her thighs.

"Are you alright?" Shaak asked.

Ahsoka quickly looked around and realized she was in the cockpit. "Sorry, I just had a dream."

"It sounded bad."

Ahsoka shook her head. "I don't really know. It was just strange."

Shaak didn't press. "We're almost to Shili. And I think it might be better if you stay here. I'll meet my contact at the spaceport."

Ahsoka knitted her eyebrows, but didn't ask why. They were silent until they came to the system and began their approach.

"You're not coming back, are you?" Ahsoka asked.

Shaak shook her head. "No. I need to leave. The galaxy isn't a safe place anymore. Not for any Jedi."

Ahsoka ignored the blatant quip towards her. "So that's it then," she said.

Shaak nodded, and then spoke. "Just because you aren't a Jedi any more doesn't mean you won't be in danger. You should lay low, and stay out of the Empire's way. It will be safer that way."

Ahsoka nodded, but there was nothing in her plan that involved laying low.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I actually really liked writing this chapter! It's totally a filler, so nothing really exciting happens in it, but it was still fun. Most of this comes from the original chapter. I hope you all enjoy it!**

 **Also, thank you to everyone who is favourited and/or followed this story!**

* * *

Shili was no longer home, so there was no reason for her to stay. The ship's map was fairly complete, which wasn't exactly a surprise. Ahsoka chose a random system, Enarc, and punched the coordinates in. The trip had taken a few days, and Ahsoka used that time learning about the ship and its secret compartments.

When she reached Enarc, Republic warships surrounded the planet. She panicked, but realized they weren't there for her. Obviously they weren't. She quit worrying and set the ship down in one of the busier spaceports. She should leave this ship and swap it out with a new one, just in case she could get tracked through it.

The bazaar was full of people and vendors. Ahsoka weaved in and out of them, taking in the sights and smells that the planet had to offer. After being shot down by a vendor who refused her republic credits, Ahsoka sat in a small café across from what looked like a painter's shop. Inside was a painting that caught her eye. It was of a young girl there was something about the girl that made Ahsoka think she knew her. Getting up from her seat, Ahsoka walked to the shop and stepped in.

The shop was covered in beautiful paintings of a tranquil world, eerily similar to the one she was on, but the paintings were full of waterfalls, and from what she knew of Enarc, it didn't have any waterfalls. She browsed for a second before finding the painting of the girl. The brush strokes were clear and methodical, and Ahsoka could tell the amount of work and care that had been put into it. The girl took up most of the painting, and her hair tumbled from her shoulders and eventually became a waterfall. Her dress was a steel grey that turned into rock, and her face was covered by a shining sun, but Ahsoka could just make out her features: a small nose, a mouth turned upwards in a smile and a pair of eyes that seemed to be staring right at her.

Ahsoka was so enraptured with the painting that she didn't notice the shop owner walk up to her. "It's not for sale," he told her. Ahsoka looked away from the painting and at the shopkeeper. Dark brown curls framed his face and hung just above his shoulders. Tanned skin told her that he wasn't a native of this world, and she briefly wondered where he had come from.

"Who is this?"

The man smiled briefly at the painting before turning back to Ahsoka.

"A friend, from long ago." He smiled and took the painting down to examine it further. "Such a long time ago," he whispered, and held it at an angle so that Ahsoka could see it better. When the sunlight from the window hit it, the paint seemed to come alive, and the rays that covered the girl's face disappeared, and Ahsoka could see the face clearly, and she knew why it had seemed so familiar.

"Is this Padme Amidala?" she asked, and the painter looked at her, startled.

"No, this is Padme Naberrie, an important distinction. She became Amidala later in life..." He trailed off for a moment, and then it seemed to sink in that Ahsoka had known her. "How do you know her?"

"She and I were friends," she said, choosing her words carefully.

"Ah, so you must be a senator too?" He took in her age, and then added, "Or perhaps an aid?"

"No," she clarified. "But I did know her from the Senate."

He regarded her a moment, but didn't ask for anything else. "I'm Palo," he said, extending his hand. Ahsoka took the hand and shook.  
Ahsoka started to reply, but knew that she couldn't go by her actual name. This world was too far into the Core for it to be safe. No mention of Ahsoka Tano must reach her former Master. "Call me Damari," she finally answered.

Palo smiled. "It's nice to meet you Damari," he said, giving no mention to her long pause. "Do you like painting?" he asked quickly, perhaps to move on from the fact that he knew Damari was no her real name.

Ahsoka shook her head. "No, I'm more for action."

"Sometimes, I am too. It would always bother me the way Padmé would simply argue through a talk, or a fight. We never just…fought…" Palo trailed off, and Ahsoka smiled at the memory of a young Padmé.

"Well, I had better go," she said after a moment, though she was loathe to leave. There was something about Palo and his art gallery that calmed Ahsoka, and after the month she had had, relaxing was something that she needed.

Palo extended his hand again and they shook. "If you see Padme again, please tell her I say hello!" Ahsoka smiled and said she would, but wasn't sure if she would ever get the chance. She left the shop and looked around again. Almost immediately, something was off. Instead of following her instinct and finding a place to lay low, Ahsoka followed her nose for trouble.

Eventually, she came upon a group of Clones. They were interviewing the locals, showing them holos of Jedi, asking if any of them had come to this planet. Ahsoka was sure that she wasn't on that list, but one could never be too careful. Besides, the presence of Clones here meant that whoever was hunting the Jedi-be it Anakin or someone else-was working fast. Ahsoka reached to grab the hood of her cloak instinctively and it pained her to remember it wasn't there.

The Clones were getting closer, so Ahsoka quickly left the area and headed back to the spaceport. She would eventually need to get rid of her ship, but now was not the place or time. She knew it would be much safer if she headed away from the Core worlds. Those would be the planets that were hit first. And while Enarc wasn't exactly in the Deep Core, it was next to Naboo, which was the Chancellor's home world, so it made sense that there would be a heavy military presence here. Ahsoka racked her brain for a planet that was relatively unburdened by the war, and ultimately decided to find a world on the Smuggler's map in her ship.

Once aboard, Ahsoka did a quick search of the planets before deciding on Dubrillion. It was a planet that had been under the CIS, so the presence of Clones was unlikely, and it was a planet that this ship went to often. Perhaps she could do a bit of trading there and come out with a new ship. She set a course, left Enarc behind, and started off into a new life. She only hoped it had a more of a satisfying end to it than her last one as Jedi. She had been in limbo for so long, and it seemed only fair to give Damari the smuggler a chance at a better life.


End file.
